My father told me, after I kicked my ex-husband (The Pile) out of the house and out of my life, that if I were to ever stick my foot in the waters of love again I'd better be damn sure that he wasn't someone that needed fixing. He also told me to sit down and write a list of "qualifications" that were a must in a man and don't settle for anything less.............This was my list:
- If he consumes alcohol it must only be socially and minimally
- He must NOT be a user of drugs
- He must work hard and take pride in his work
- He must not be attached to his mother (like her and love her does not mean attached)
- He must be kind to my children and accept them as a part of his life
- He must treat me with respect
- He must not ever raise a hand to harm me or my children
- He must put the toilet seat down
- He must believe in marriage
- He must know how to take care of himself but allow me to take care of him
- He must make me feel safe and secure
- He must get along with my parents
- He must allow me to talk on the phone when I want to
- He must let me get my hair done without question
- He must not come between me and my friends but be a part of us when possible
- He must not be arrogant
- He must be physically affectionate
(This list is not in an order from most important to least important. It is just a list)
So more then 2 years ago I met the man that fills all of these requirements and then some. The little things that he does have become some of the most important things in my life. The man does all of the above AND.....holds my hand. Need I say more?
Life on the North Shore is truly God's country......In the SUMMER!!!! Oh my goodness! The last two weeks here have been short of hell when it comes to driving (or should I say....my ability to drive, or not) in the elements that winter weather brings.
December brought lots of snow for our entire state. Schools were closed, businesses were closed, friends were snowed in their homes. etc. So I am not alone when it comes to white knuckle driving. However, up until last winter (which was pretty tame) I wasn't required to drive in the elements if I chose not to. I ran a child day care center out of my home for 16 years prior to my move to God's country. Just roll out of bed put my feet on the floor and "shazaam!", I was at work. NOW? I drive 25 miles to work one way and several times during the year (38 times to be exact) I spend 12 hours behind the wheel (15.5 last Monday) transporting precious cargo, aka, my children, back and forth from their father's home to mine and back.
It all began December 27th. Down to pick up my kids. 12.5 hours on the road. Uneventful.
The 30th of December proved to me my scariest commute to work by far. I live on a gravel road. That small stretch was smooth sailing. When I hit the tar? It went all down hill (literally). The night before brought freezing rain and the temperature remained steady at 33 degrees. Either freeze or thaw! Make up your damn mind! When I hit the tar my car completely spun around in the middle of the road. There were cars coming down the hill fish tailing as far up as I could see. I had to keep moving to avoid being hit. I ended up part way in the ditch in order to stop sliding and decided I would crawl down the hill and get off the main road at the first available side road. I made it and parked. Whew! As I watched cars sliding by and took note of a semi not able to make it up the hill, I kept thinking, hmm, I may be here for hours but at least I am off the main road. I called my sweetheart and let him know what was going on and to give him warning of the road conditions. I then called my immediate boss to let her know I would more then likely be late or not make it in at all. Just then the General Manager of my place of employment pulled up next to me (he is our neighbor). He saw me and knew I would not be very happy. He sat there for about 20 minutes and decided to make another attempt at it. I wasn't up for it yet. We exchanged phone numbers and off he went. Another 20 minutes went by and my phone rang. It was my GM. He had made it to town. He said it was much better and that I should just go slow and not to worry about being late for work. So I proceeded and safely made it to town. 5 miles down 20 to go. The road between town and work was just wet and all was fine. I was 6 minutes late for work. grrrrrr.
We had icy roads for the next 2 days and I was late for work one more time.
January 3rd.......time to take the kids back to their dads. First 300 miles was perfect. The 300 miles after that? Not so much. After I dropped them off it started to snow. The road got slippery and it was 40 mph for over 100 miles. The weather cleared up about half way home and all seemed to be good, tired but good, until I crossed our county line. Then guess what? More snow? No! Besides lots of winter weather here we have a lot of.......DEER!!! 2 deer were in the middle of the road ass to ass across both lanes. BOOM! I took at least one of them out and I am sure I injured the other. I know enough not to swerve and was lucky enough to be going quite slow due to the "S" curve I just came out of. The only damage done was to my car's grille and my nerves. Made it home at 10:45 pm. Long day.
January 7th........back on the road to pick up my kids. Made it the first 200 miles and guess what? WIND! So strong that it was making visibility quite low and was hard to keep the car on the road. My weather alert chimed on my phone and said that bad weather was moving into my parent's neck of the woods also which is 175 miles further after I pick up the kids. I pulled off the road and called my dad. He said it was really getting nasty outside and to go back home. He knew how tired I was and didn't think it was worth taking the kids out in it. I called my kids, hesitantly, and cancelled our weekend together. I felt so bad but am sure it was the right decision to make. Turned around and came home. 8 hours in the car for nothing.
So you see.......I am not complaining. Just saying. Life as we now know it involves lots of driving, lots of snow and, okay, lots of deer. I love living here. It is truly God's country. I pray that God will give me a little, actually a big, break in the weather in the months ahead. 2 more months? maybe 3? Reality will probably be 6. It did snow on May 31st 2 years ago up here........
I used to be an avid social networking gal and decided 2 years ago that it was becoming way to much of an addiction and taking up way to much of my time so I closed all of my accounts and said goodbye......
So over the past year or more I have become a junky to the Only Parent Chronicles written by "That One Mom". Her site has kept me feeling close to her. You see, just over a year ago I moved 300 miles away. Not only from her (I am the bff she often mentions in her posts) from but the rest of my life that I had known for 20 years. (these topics are for a later post).
What I have been thinking is blogging myself. Not only to write my thoughts down for therapy and whatever else this experience may or may not do for my brain, but I thought I could return the favor to That One Mom. I know she misses me being physically close to her as do I to her.
So as I decide to begin this journey.................here's to you K. I miss you and love you very much.
